My mom is such a bitch.

FFFFFT SHUT THE FUCK UP, DOUCHEBAG.

Yesterday I went to my cousin's place. My stupid little cousin Jia Le was there fuck. My mom kept on flirting with my eldest cousin; I think he's infatuated with her lol. Always talking to her, and the most spirited one at that. Goddammit, I still wonder what my dad sees in her. He always showers her with things and all she does is tell him in an irritated manner, 'Stop irritating me.'

What the fuck, right?

And at the dinner, Jia Le was sitting opposite me. The second oldest cousin next to me. So when the second oldest's sister wanted some tissue, which was next to him and far from her reach, he tried taking some out. Tried because they were so deep inside. So I grabbed it from him and the bottom fell out. Jia Le (the fucking snob) said haughtily, 'At home, ours is better/higher quality than yours.' GOD FUCKING DAMN IT, WHO THE HELL WOULDN'T BE PISSED OFF BY THAT FAG?!

Me: 'Sheares(Jia Le), that's not a nice thing to say.'
JL: 'HAHAHAHA YOU'RE SO GIRLY'
Me: *puts on bimbo voice* 'And you're so manly teehee~' [Of course I was just playing around with him]
Mom: *glares*
Eldest cousin: *walks by*
Mom: *smiles at him* *turns back and glares again*
Me: 'What?'
Mom: Don't speak in that sarcastic manner. *points*

WHAT THE-

FLASHBACK
Me: '...Mom.' *points*
Mom: 'Don't point.'

BACK TO YESTERDAY

So.
My mom is such a bitch.
I was asking her, 'Mom let's go home, Constance and I are tired.' So she replied, 'Wait.' And turned back to my eldest cousin.
That was at 10 PM.
Then, I went to my second eldest cousin's bedroom and talked to him to ease my boredom. Then he fell asleep. So I had nothing else to do lol.

So of course I slept; I was tired and bored.
Then at 12 PM
Eldest cousin barges in.
'What are you doing here?'
Me: 'What else? Sleeping.'
EC: 'Don't sleep here. Anyway, your mom is calling you.'
Me: 'What for?'
EC: 'Go home la.' *duhh face*
Me: 'Goddammit, now? I'm fucking tired and she wants me to drag my sorry ass back to that sty?'
EC: O_O *LOL*
Me: 'Get out of my way. (Fag)'
EC: *backs against the cupboard*
Mom: 'Why the hell did you take so long?'

FLASHBACK
Me: 'Ah, piss.'
Mom: 'Don't swear.'

BACK TO NOW

Mom: 'Yesterday I gave you face. You called your cousins names.'

FLASHBACK

Dinner time.
Fag!Jia Le's sister is Jia Qi.

Me: *puts on British accent* 'Of course not, darling.'
JQ: 'HAHA YOU SOUND LIKE GURMIT SINGHHHHHH'

How on Earth can Gurmit Singh have a British accent, for God's sake?

CONTINUATION
Me: 'I don't.'
JQ: 'You do! Doofus.'
She's only 10, by the way.
Me: *British accent* 'I do not, idiot.' [I was playing again, I don't have the energy anymore to entertain kids]
JQ: 'Moron! Gurmit Singh. Where're your yellow boots?'
Me: *rolls eyes*
JQ: 'Aha! So you ARE Gurmit Singh! :D'

BACK TO NAO

Me: 'Um, in the first place, I was playing with her only. And she called me those names.'
Mom: 'I don't care. Don't do that. A more mature way~'

OKAY, I DON'T WANT TO CONTINUE THIS FAIL.

By the way, LOL has another meaning. It's reserved for Fag!Jia Le.
L - Lump
O- Of
L- Lard

KTHXBAI PPL. CONTINUE WITH YOUR EPIC PHAIL LIVES.